News of the Wierd

U.S. Prepares to Test Bird Flu Vaccines Still unsure how to catch all the birds.

Saddam's half-brother captured Other half remains at large.

Monday's are for Marketing

Today was a bit of a blur with some shades of programming, outlines in email, textures of phone calls, and highlights of marketing all on a canvas of decent productivity. What a happy picture!

Those Questions!

To jump over 4 lanes of interstate at you need to be going 100 mph. (original story)

From the mouths of babes

My absolute favorite morning routine:
Amy looks to Daddy as she reaches toward the cat and asking for approval says, "I be nice. I be gentle."

Pride

I'm a fantastic programmer, manager and technophile.

There is no challenge that I would not accept and always have success.

Envy

Too reaching. Too contrived. If there is one thing I am not, it's envious.
Two places.

1) I've spent a bunch of mental energy of late remembering those people in high school that were more assertive and self-confident than myself in the realm of dating and pondering how bygone times might have been different.

2) Thinking about those folks that stayed the course, followed the rules, conformed to society, work 8-5, and have nice cars, spacious houses, lawn service to keep the elegant yards, weekly maid service to fend off the filth and other things that fall under Gluttony and Greed and further contribute to Wrath and Sloth.

Greed

Display Report
Display Report
Display Report
Display Report
Display Report
Display Report

OK! Viewing performance reports doesn't make the money from Google's Adsense program come in any faster.

Gluttony

I went to Earth Fare today (I suppose I need say no more) and splurged by allowing myself to eat some sushi and I wasn't really hungry. Since Cathy had to eat low carb and low sugar today the trip to Earth Fare was done with good intentions yea Gluttony struck none-the-less.

Lust

Sex makes women happy, it's official

Having sex is the high point of most women's days, while commuting is the low point. And most women like being with their kids less than they admit...with 6 being the strongest and 0 the weakest women gave "intimate relations" a positive score of 5.10

Female orgasm is in the genes

A woman's ability to reach orgasm is partly due to her genes and the relative importance of environmental factors versus genes seems to vary depending on whether a woman masturbates, has sexual intercourse or oral sex.
The researchers found that when women try to reach orgasm through masturbation about half (51%) of their chance of success depended on their genes. When they had penetrative sex, genes accounted for just 31% of their chance of success, and 37% when a women and her partner used other methods.
...may support the theory that orgasm plays a role in evolution such as to retain sperm

Note: This study was done with 3000 Australian female twins including genetically identical twins and non-identical twins. Somewhere out there is a very, very happy research assistant (tick that one off as Envy).

Orgasms play tricks on your mind-brain

Orgasms activate parts of the brain responsible for euphoria and pleasure, but also emotion...orgasms are better if you're in love. ...we tend to have orgasms with the right side of our brain

Note: Does this make lefties better lovers?

"Drug companies should be including tests of orgasm function before marketing their drugs."

Now there's a Quality Assurance job that sounds fun!

Orgasms can be such a pain

For some people reaching orgasm can be a painful experience – if they are the one per cent of the population who suffer from sexual headaches.

Too much sex gives you arthritis Uh. I'm at a loss for words.

Sex is good for you

Sex is good for your immune system as well as your ego...people who report having sex once or twice a week have elevated levels of an immune protein found in saliva which is the first line of defence against colds and flu

Skip the flu shot! Stay in bed!

Why polygamous sex has its benefits

Three recent studies on sex reveal that polygamy holds biological benefits and dominated human history so much that it is imprinted in our genes.
...researchers discovered that while more men than women are squeezed out of the gene pool, Y chromosome variations indicate that those men whose genes survived tended to travel and to have multiple female partners.

Sex: do we really need it? Cool picture.

Wrath

In response to the dog's mess this morning I roared with anger. I was mad at myself and my anger came out directed toward my wife. Wrath feeds wrath. The uncomfortable silences, the distance, the awkwardness that follow an injustice irrationally placed upon another stokes the fires within the angry person as that person becomes more incensed at himself for having slipped in the first place.

Five more sins to go. I think I've got Lust covered.

Sloth

I slept in this morning and paid the price. The puppy is making great progress at moving to the outside for doing its business. This morning it couldn't wait and hid its pee in the bathroom which goes under the cabinet and makes for a very difficult cleanup. Ironically as I slept I dreamed I was Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black (amz) except I wasn't Death I was the Devil but I was teaching people values and I had an obsession with eatting sugar (Men in Black?). It was humorous to reveal my identity to the preachers and other folk I encountered while I pointed out their sins.

    

Sinus Part Deux

Snot fair.

Archeology

Last night I dug out a bucket of un-opened mail circa 2001. Now, why not just toss the whole thing? Some of this mail still might have some relevance. But I did burn about half! The next pass will be far more discriminatory.

In other finds, I've been battling the sluggishness and memory problems of this computer..an Athlon 900mhz with 256 MB PC133 ram when suddenly I remembered a computer in the garage that I've been scavenging parts for various reasons. It had 256MB PC133 ram in it! So as of today at not cost I am upgraded to 512MB ram! I might just have to play some Pirates (buy at Amz) to see if it performs better!

Lost

Certain in our house don't last beyond one use. Neosporin in our house is a one use item. After its used on a single cut or scrape the tube disappears. My daughter and I did the hapless search this morning to treat her papercut. On a different note, it looks like everything can be bought on Amazon. I think I'll try to start making more purchases there.

In other Lost, last night's episode was fantastic. In the flash back scene where the Japanese man delivered the thank you and got the dog did anyone see Hurley getting out of a car on the television that the child was watching? I love how the flashbacks tie the characters together. I also find it intriguing that the two people with apparent special abilities both verbalized that they "like it here." I wonder when the boys special talent is going to be revealed. The preview for next week's show has me wanting to fast forward my life and get this week over with.

USA Today writes 'Lost' Island burns with mystery By Bill Keveney

  

Recommended Read

If you don't read Sanity Adrift, you should. He has produced yet another gem!

Be sure to check out Tim's tips sites:
Excel Tips
Blog Tips
Tech Tips

State of Me

Oh man! I bought some good beans yesterday. I feel like a ex-coke head that just "took one snort for ol' times"
javajavajavajava
good beans, good incense, good dub...hell if a check comes in the mail today I may start thinking I'm dreaming

A New Day!

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This Morning
I woke at 3:22 again this morning. I like the 3:22 time. I just wish I would rise. Again at 4:30 and sometime in the 5 o'clock hour and finally rose at 6. I have a blogging buzz at the moment as I've been blogging and typing too much and ignoring things I need to be doing. Time to turn attention to those things.

Today is all about programming.

Of Grasshoppers

Student: Master, you smell funny.
Master: I smell the same as you.

Cold Water Washing

Could this possibly work?

Thanks to Halley's Comment for the link!

What a day! Selfish, but great!

So I started the day with some spackling in the bedroom. Then I took 15 thirty gallon trash bags of clothing and toys that we collected from the kids rooms during the last mass cleaning and stowed in the garage to Goodwill. Since things that smell good to me don't smell good to my pregnant wife we stopped off at Green Earth Emporium and bought some incense that she should find more appealing. Some grocery shopping and then home to finally find her maternity clothing! I should clarify that I've torn the bedroom and our storage system apart trying to find these clothes. The clothing was the inspiration to get the donations to Goodwill. I've randomly walked into the garage and stared hoping that something would metaphysically happen to show me these clothes. Today Cathy decides to check the garage herself. After 3 minutes she points at the box and says, "What's in that?" She is so happy! Of course, the clothing was stored in a box that solitarily sat on top of our freezer and could have been discovered weeks ago had I "looked up."

The Goodwill bags were a major impedance to making progress in the garage. The other challenges to finishing the buildout in the food pantry/garage are:

• Rework electrical
• Rework hvac duct work
• Plumbing for hot and cold for potential sink in garage, icemaker in food pantry, optional washer dryer connection in food pantry
• Drain for hvac condensation trap
• Drain for option washer and garage sink
• Dryer vent
• drywall
• Shelving
• Doors
• Paint
• Flooring

Progress!

Wahoo! More database progress!

Today's olfactory and auditory pleasures

Mixed 2 tablespoons water with 5 drops peppermint oil (same brand I use) and 7 drops rosemary oil (same brand I use). MMmmmm.

Listening to Jimmy Buffett's Boats

      

Feeling good!

Yahoo! I achieved stretching! Noah stretched with me. What fun! I enjoy Noah quite a bit. He's such a genuinely good person.

MSN today offers Strategies for getting back into an exercise routine By: Lou Schuler

Tragedy!

On no! I've run out of coffee! Not actually a big deal except that I'm almost out of herbal tea too! I've cut my caffeine intake way down. I allow myself up to 3 cups of coffee per day. No sodas. I drink decaf tea with the exception on one or two herbal teas that have minor caffeine in them.

Yesterday I actually did something for myself. I worked on the database design for TN Lottery Results. As soon as the database design is in place I can lay a new look on the site. Right now it looks like such trash. I also put in some client hours programming. And had a very rewarding time working with my son on a school project.

In the evening I had the Asperger's Support Group and arrived after several of the guests. They were setting chairs up around tables which I don't think is conducive to a support group setting so after some room rearranging and confirming our dates out to August we were rolling. Fantastic discussions! What a wonderful group of people we had with caregivers for people of ages 5 to adult. Everyone contributed and we had interesting topics such as 'will an aspie ever be able to write?' and 'is the messy eatting sensory or fine motor?' and 'do they have friends?' (a resounding "no" simultaneously from the entire group). Of course there was some school discussion and other topics. I was spacey. Having taken the wrong car to the support group I left Cathy needing to get to her meeting and taking the girls without a car seat.

Moving On

Hunter S. Thompson, the author who pioneered "gonzo" journalism and became an anti-establishment icon with his 1972 book "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas," fatally shot himself at his home outside Aspen, Colorado, Sunday night, police said. He was 67.

Productivity!

Yesterday was a great day in the bedroom! (pervs) Much cleaning was had! Many papers were burned. I wish I could spend the rest of the week just cleaning and working on the house. Better check my lottery numbers.

Of Grasshoppers

Student: I always get mad at the wrong things.
Master: What are the right things?

All Parents Bookmark This!

Make toys at home with common household materials, often in only a few minutes, that demonstrate fascinating scientific principles.

• Magetism (eg. Magnetic Ring Launcher)
• Electromagnetism (eg. A 10 minute railgun)
• Electrochemistry (eg. Building your own solar battery.)
• Radio (eg. A radio out of household items)
• Thermodynamics (eg. World's simplest steam boat)
• Aerodynamics (eg. A Bernoulli levitation ball)
• Light and optics (eg. Make a spectroscope from a CD.)
• Biology (eg. Listening to Electric Fish)
• Mathematics (eg. Kaleidocycles)

Thanks to Boing Boing for the link

Speed!

What's this? Blogger isn't dragging? Web pages are coming up quickly? Haloscan is popping up? Murph must be setting me up for a doozie!

Thanks to Kim at Bacon and Eh's for the link!

Progress!

I've made exceptional headway on a PHP project.

Now I'll set into a toolchest and turn into my secret identity of Handi-Man! "In today's episode, Handi-Man tackles Evil Bedroom in The Mystery of the Missing Maternity Clothing!"

Husband Duties

As a husband, it is my duty to find creative ways to bring a frown to my wife's face daily. If I were to fail to make her frown I'd be a boyfriend not a husband.

The dog went outside!

And when I said "went" I mean there wasn't anything on my floors for me to cleanup! She did this yesterday or the day before also. That is not to say that she has quit using the training pads inside. She is still having accidents but I view this as major progress. As a bonus she has picked two very specific spots in the yard.

Promoting Abstinence

10 Things Every Girl Should Know About Boys and Their Privates from The Iron Hymen

Thanks to Kim at Bacon and Eh's for the link!

In college, stoned, stolen helium, and just learned flash

I post this to give my daughter something to sing that doesn't involve peanut butter and jelly or badgers. Of course, this is to make her squish her face up and say, "huh?"

Science Excuses Men

Why men fall asleep after sex

The gentle buzz of snoring is among the most annoying sounds known to woman. Especially when it happens shortly after a passionate encounter.

Ah! Such nice words!

...men aren't entirely to blame...there are scientific reasons why men feel tired after sex.

And the science?

'The blood rush after climax depletes the muscles of energy-producing glycogen, leaving men feeling physically drained.
'Because they have more muscle mass than women, men become tired after sex and this subsequently leads to them feeling sleepy.'

And now stats...

80% of men said they felt more relaxed and were able to drift off without any problems after making love, compared with 46% of women.

Ok. That's 54% of women that have bad lovers because men if you are doing your job right that number would be higher! Where should women have sex?

Men in Birmingham managed on average to stay awake for just three to four minutes. In Glasgow and Liverpool, men claimed to take up to 20 minutes before falling asleep.

Now for the advise the article offers to stay awake...

'Try I Feel Good by James Brown, Elvis Presley's A Little Less Conversation or Britney Spears's Toxic.'...videotape their lovemaking sessions - so they have something to watch afterwards...

And finally, a somewhat comforting statistic for half the male population...

48 per cent of men had actually fallen asleep during the act itself. A mere 11 per cent of women admitted being guilty of this.

A New Day!

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This Morning
I did a computer repair for a business in town. I'm really enjoying the computer repair business despite the frustration sometimes accompanied with it.

I had a very pleasant business lunch.

Now I settle in to program.

Of course, it's a gorgeous day outside. Wish I could take the dog to the dog park and get the kids outside.

Quote of the Day

While discussing a machine that supposedly can predict the future:

'There's plenty of evidence that time may run backwards,' says Prof Bierman at the University of Amsterdam.

The box has apparently predicted the 9/11 attacks four hours before they happened and the tsunami 24 hours before it happened as well as many other world events.

DEEP in the basement of a dusty university library in Edinburgh lies a small black box, roughly the size of two cigarette packets side by side, that churns out random numbers in an endless stream.

The box is being used as evidence to support the concept of a global consciousness.

Got Disney?

Do you like Disneyland? Disney is auctioning several things such as a vacation (current bid $15,100), Skyway vehicles, and cars from Space Mountain. Good luck!

Valentine's and money

This past Saturday the kids each received a Valentine's card from my folks with a $5 bill in each one. Even two year old Amy got a $5 bill. She was so thrilled with it that she ran up on her house and sat there smiling at it as she held it stretched between her two hands. I asked her to give it to me for safe keeping and she didn't complain. A few minutes later Cathy saw her walking down the hall with tears streaming down her face as she wimpered over and over "he took it." I quickly returned it.

When I thought it had been forgotten I gave it to Cathy for safe keeping. This morning Amy sat on her house with her Valentine's Day card and said, "I lost my dollar."

Of Grasshoppers

Student: The birds sound so happy when they sing.
Master: The birds are happy because they sing.

Seven Signs Your It's Time to Toss Your Résumé

CareerBuilder brings us some suggestions for our resumes. 7 mistakes:

1. No Career Summary/Introductory Statement
2. Lack of Keywords and Phrases (The article suggests this book)
3. No Evidence of Your Experience
   

   Describe a Problem, the Action you took, the Results you achieved and Skills you applied.

4. Use of Personal Pronouns and Articles
5. Irrelevant Information
6. Poor Formatting
7. Typos and Misspelled Words

The article finishes by reminding us that the purpose of the resume is to "communicate your experiences and accomplishments as they relate to an open position and to obtain a job interview" and that the resume should be customized for each opportunity.

A New Day!

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This Morning
Some mornings the bed seems so warm and safe. This was one of those mornings. I just didn't want to get up.

Progressive Church

Church of England debating whether to allow female bishops. Critics say move won't help women to move forward, only diagonally. "...and in order to attract more sinners to church, we are considering topless bishops..."

Of Grasshoppers

Student: What is the hardest thing to teach?
Master: I'll let you answer that question.

From the mouths of babes

Since the cat is not declawed apparently we have spoken to Amy a little too much about being careful. Now when she wants to pet the kitty she turns to us with a big smile on her face and says cheerfully "I be nice. I be gentle." and waits for approval before petting.

A New Day!

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This Morning
What an exceptional day I had yesterday! Now if only I could code a little faster.

Sometime like this always pops up when I'm suddenly underworked.

"Do what you love and the money will follow" is great in theory, but the truth of the matter is, certain jobs and fields simply pay more. The Bureau of Labor Statistics National Compensation Survey, published in August 2004, showed that white-collar earnings -- which averaged $21.85 per hour -- were the highest among occupational groups. Blue-collar pay averaged $15.03 per hour, while the hourly pay of service occupations averaged just $10.40.
...
Top Paying Jobs Overall
Physicians and surgeons $147,000
Aircraft pilots $133,500
Chief executives $116,000
Electrical and electronic engineers $112,000
Lawyers and judges $99,800
Dentists $90,000
Pharmacists $85,500
Management analysts $84,700
Computer and information system managers $83,000
Financial analysts, managers and advisers $84,000
Marketing and sales managers $80,000
Education administrators $80,000

Top Paying Jobs That Do Not Require a High School Degree
Industrial production managers $36,000
Bailiffs, correctional officers and jailers $36,400
Paralegals and legal assistants $36,400
Drafters $36,000
Construction manager $33,600
Electricians $31,900

Top Paying Jobs for High School Graduates
Computer software engineers $58,900
Computer/information systems managers $56,400
Computer programmers $55,000
Network systems and data communications analysts $49,000
General and operations managers $48,000
Database, network and computer systems administrators $48,000

Top Paying Jobs for a Two-Year College Degree
Business analysts $58,000
Electrical and electronic engineers $57,000
Mechanical engineers $56,800
General and operations managers $54,000
Computer and information systems managers $50,400

BestBuy does rebates

Unlike the rebate ripoff I received from Cingular, BestBuy was quick to act on their rebates.

Woot!
Slickdeals.net

Hormonal Teenagers

Need I say more?

Progress!

Updated resume sent off and uploaded to The Perfect Job.

Failed to clean

Last night I thought I'd tackle a box labelled "stuff and trash" but I couldn't bring myself to go through it. It has old calendars, my first father's day cards from the kids, account statements and other miscellanea. I'll try again tonight.

I've been diagnosed!

Thanks to Marshall!

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Low
Schizotypal:	Moderate
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Moderate
Histrionic:	High
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	Low
Dependent:	Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

Bad kisser?

Did the Teacher Say to Put Your Tongue in My Mouth?

Since 1998, more than 500 couples have paid $275 to learn Byrd's secrets for giving or receiving a passionate kiss. ... Most are married and in their late 30s to mid-50s. Some couples have come from as far away as Africa, Korea and cities all over the United States...

Ok. I could teach this class! And if I could get 20 students per month we'd be doing ok!

Thank you wife!

For Valentine's Day my wife got me my very own red Swingline stapler! If anyone tries to take it I might just have to burn the building down.

The day goes wrong. Oh let me count the ways!

So I decide to take the dog to the bus stop and when the other girl showed up Molly became so excited that she spilled my coffee all over the console ruining our school coupon booklet and getting coffee on my near mint condition book. I called to Sarah to hand me the towel we keep in the back of the car and she moves in that one speed that all our children seem to only know. These kids have no understanding of urgency.

At least I maintained composure and did not curse or yell.

Tuesdays are for typing

Let's start the day off with a PayPal donation link:


This Morning
I woke at 1:30, 3:00, 4:30 and finally got up at 6:05 in one of those panics where I wished death would visit instead of making me have to face the day. I really wanted to skip sleeping last night in favor of productivity. I need a vacation so badly it hurts and I mean one of those vacations where I get away from work, bills and home repair.

Sarah wrestles the dog. It's nice to see them starting to bond.
Noah, thrilled in his own independence, has walked to the bus stop.
Tommy refuses to eat the eggs I cooked today; instead he sits on his bed waiting for the bus to come so he can get dressed.
Amy, by some miracle and despite Sarah playing fetch with the dog up and down the hallway, remains asleep.
Omega grows.
Cathy rests.

Not quite as planned

I declared Monday's for Marketing. But this morning I decided that it was important to make some headway on my two projects. Once of them required that I put a new CPU fan on my development server. I headed to CompUSA and bought the wrong fan. Went out a second time to exchange it but left without my wallet. They didn't have the right fan anyway and fortunately returned my money without asking for id. I finally found the fan in another part of town. It's now 10pm at night and the machine is finally back together...a process that only took 14 hours.

Reading Choice

I've dusted off William Gibson's Neuromancer to rekindle the cyberpunk in me. I'll have to watch Hackers and blare Billy Idol's Cyberpunk to really draw out the punk!

    

Dead hardware

Ugh. My dev server's cpu fan is dead. I must go to CompUSA and pay way too much for way too little.

If anyone knows someone with $10k or so that they are looking to dump on a good cause, have them contact me. I sure could use a little relief.

Today's Names

Heidi Crumb (University of TN, Knoxville)
Patricia Sothman Vinyard (University of TN, Knoxville)
Craig Howard (University of TN, Knoxville)
Joline Johnson (Medford, NJ)
Suzanne Summers (Univeristy of TN, Knoxville)
Earl Harrison Reed "Bucky" (University of TN, Knoxville)
Amy Brace (University of TN, Knoxville)

Lack of memories

When I was 11 years old I became over the top concerned with the potential loss of memory. By that point in my life we were living in my 4th house and 3rd city and already I felt a lack of permanence. The people around me did not know my stories and had not shared my adventures of previous years so no group memory of clubs, friends and escapades existed. I decided I wanted to start chronicling my life on paper but like my family tree and letters to past friends and family nothing ever materialized until roughly 10 years later when I finally began journaling.

Ironically I have very patchy memories of my teens. The memories are there and come in spurts but its like I've blocked them.

I know when I moved to Medford, NJ at 14 years old that I suddenly realized no one knew anything about me, could not verify my stories, and I could become anyone I wanted to be with any past that I so chose to create. I chose the truth and I'd had so many off the wall experiences by that point in my life that even the truth sounded far fetched at times.

At 19 I started blackout drinking and spent the next half a decade give or take with my evening's actions being commentated to me by others that remembered far more of the night than I ever would. There is one particular 20 minute lapse in my life at 4am in downtown Knoxville with a cute blonde that I'd really like to remember. Am I making a sexual reference? I dunno. It could have been 20 minutes of rejection, sex, smoking or shooting heroin for all I know. (to the best of my knowledge I've never shot heroin) I distinctly remember being in the club. I remember the girl. I remember being questioned about where I was and what I was doing but for the life of me I have no recollection of that 20 minutes of my life. Do I want to remember those 20 minutes for the act? No, not really. Mostly I'd like to fill in the blank but that's just 1 of 1000 such blanks.

Now-a-days names and faces of people that I don't interact with for two weeks or so quickly fade. It's very frustrating to recognize someone and not be able to nail down exactly why you know this person or what their name is.

My Alzheimer's is going to be fun!

Peak Productivity

I'm most productive when my desk is clean, my music collection is alphabetized and all cds are in their cases, I have daily exercise and I have daily fiction reading.

Right now I have none of that.

Names on my mind lately

Withers "Wiz" Morgan (University of TN, Knoxville)
Elizabeth Wilburn (Cary, NC)
Joanna Grist (Wilmington, NC)
Andy "Drew" Ward (Medford, NJ)
Brian Larose (University of TN, Knoxville)
Chris Jepeway (University of TN, Knoxville)
Bruce Gay (Cary, NC)

Death of a Playwright

Arthur Miller (1915-2005) has passed. As Sammy Davis Jr had Mr Bojangles, I've always feared Willy Loman's fate for myself.

    

A New Day!

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This Morning
I've been neglecting my links of late due to extreme stress and the fact that my computer has slowed down to the point of almost being unusable. Time for more RAM me thinks.
Today let's add juliepatchouli and Bitchin4Sanity.

Moose and Squirrel

The dog and the cat are hilarious. The cat is not declawed and the dog just wants to play with the cat. The cat wants the dog to play but by her rules. She typically parks herself within range of the dog, a window sill or bookshelf, and the dog will come up to her and sniff her and lick her. When she's had enough she plays drums on the dogs nose and for some reason never uses her claws. The dog doesn't get it and keeps trying to lick her so the cat incorporates both front paws pounding on the dogs nose as fast as she can. It's a sight I need to video.

Stand up (9.3MB - 37 seconds. I have to figure out how to compress video!)
Get the message (4.4MB - 17 seconds)
Good doggie..have a pet (1.4MB - 5 seconds)

Which way did he go?

What happened to Partisan Shots? I was having trouble reading it for a bit because of a Mozilla problem and now David appears awol. Anyone know what happened? I certainly enjoyed his writing.

A New Day!

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This Morning
I slept like a rock last night with vivid dreams. Yesterday I had close to no productivity and today I'm feeling stressed over it.

Winging life doesn't work. I don't even have a short term plan right now. I used to have a 10 year plan, a 5 year plan and short term plans and goals in my life. I used to know to the penny how much money was coming in and going out. I'm a disorganized mess. I have to pull it together!

Today is on-site client support day. I'll leave the house in a few minutes and be on the road until close of business so I'll fall further behind on deliverables to out of state clients.

Great Meeting

Of the 20 scouts, 7 showed and still managed to be a raucous as the full count. We had a great time! We started the meeting with attendance doing the camping game "My name is ___ and I'm taking a backpack." Next person "My name is ____ and I'm taking a backpack and a hiking staff." And each consecutive person adds an item. It went over very well. Then we played a memory game where I placed 17 items on a table (should have been about 24) and covered them. I broke the boys into two teams and gave them each 30 seconds to stare at the table. Then they were recovered and the boys had to write down everything they saw. Again. It went over well. We had a discussion and matching game on folklore. And ended the evening with a game of balloon basketball.

Bear Den
Den Meeting
February 10, 2005
Agenda
• Flag Ceremony
• Attendance
• Thomas reads folklore
• Memory Game
• Break into groups (Folklore and Balloon Basketball)
• Closing
Requirements Met
4a Tell in your own words what folklore is. List some folklore stories, folk songs, or historical legends from your own state or part of the country. Play the Folklore Match Game on page 48.
15b Play two organized games with your den.
15c Select a game that your den has never played. Explain the rules. Tell them how to play it, and then play it with them.
Take Home Achievement
4b Name at least five stories about American folklore. Point out on a United States map where they happened.
4c Read two folklore stories and tell your favorite one to your den.
15a Set up the equipment and play any two of these outdoor games with your family or friends.
_____ Backyard golf     _____ Kickball
_____ Badminton    _____ Softball
_____ Croquet    _____ Tetherball
_____ Sidewalk Shuffleboard     _____ Horseshoes
                     _____ Volleyball

Balloon Basketball

Activity Level: Moderate
Needed: Large to medium-sized playing area, any number of players, inflated balloons, empty cardboard box or wastepaper basket.
Use an inflated balloon for the ball, batting it around from player to player, and boxes or wastepaper baskets for the goals. Score as in basketball, except that a broken balloon counts five points off for the side that broke the balloon.

Nervous Leadership

I'm running the den meeting for 20 nine year old boys tonight by myself. I still don't have the boys names down pat. I'm nervous as a chicken in a fox house.

64 64 64 Zoo Lane

64 64 64 Zoo Lane
64 64 64 Zoo Lane
Just enough of a tune
To drive you insane
64 64 64 Zoo Lane

I don't know my women the way I thought I did...18/30

Think you know a crack from cleavage? Try this quiz! Boobs, Butts or Shoulders? warning! Not work safe! Nudity!

Of Grasshoppers

Student: Why is nothing in my life predictable?
Master: I knew you were going to ask that.

Life as a Programmer

You know on Monday when you go up the stairs you turn left if you want to go to the bathroom.
Then on Tuesday when you go up the stairs and you turn left if you want to go to the bathroom.
On Wednesday morning when you go up the stairs you turn left if you want to go to the bathroom.
On Wednesday afternoon having solely worked on the garage when you go up the stairs you turn left and there is no bathroom.

This is programming.

Masterbate for Life

Masterbation can get you "from one day to life in prison"

Larry Harrison Jr., 20, a U-M sophomore and a 6-foot-3, 300-pound football player ... For the second time in six days was approaching Katie Karlson's house near the University of Michigan campus with his pants down, masturbating. Victims say Harrison's status as a leading tackler for the Wolverines makes it harder to accuse him.

You know, what he is doing is wrong but life in prison for choking the monkey is a little out of whack. We have harder crimes doing less time and we are locking people up for years for crimes like this (which should be required therapy not jail) or smoking marijuana (less harmful than alcohol)?!

A New Day!

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This Morning
Yesterday was programming galore. My client will demo the product to his clients today at 5:30 so every moment of today has to be focused on code. I can take a breather tomorrow.

A New Day!

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This Morning
Closed out a project yesterday. I frantically want to close out another today.

As soon as I do I'll try to post some stories I've been saving up like the time I got to film a commercial with the country's top 5 Hooter's girls.

Today's Fix

I try to make a home repair or work on an improvement ever other day or so.

Today we have a doorknob on the bathroom door! Two weeks or so ago the doorknob quit working and was removed making it very difficult to get in and out of the bathroom.

Privacy and functionality have returned!

Get Yer Motors Runnin!

The station wagon moves again! (and stops!) All yield to the soccer mom!

Of Grasshoppers

Student: My past follows me.
Master: Your past will always be behind you.

A New Day!

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This Morning
I have recovered. Now to help the others mend.

Stop!

Yahoo! Shiny new brake components (new rotors and new calipers) are installed on the wagon! The only thing left to do is spend 30 minutes bleeding the brakes (takes 2 people) and put the tires back on. The car will be mobile by tomorrow evening.

Of Grasshoppers

Student: Why can't even one of my days go as planned?
Master: What fun would that be?

Productivity!

I got my development environment working on Cathy's computer upstairs! Now I can program while watching the kids get ready for school!

Protection

Sounded like Tommy was going to have a fit and Amy rushed into my arms. Hard to type with one hand. Going to burn the eggs. She is fun to hold!

My Stress

At this very moment I want to simultaneously be shaving, working on the car, blogging, programming, cooking bacon and eggs and going over Noah's scout work with him. And simultaneously serve Amy's need for interaction and care. My head wants to explode.

A New Day!

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This Morning
I overslept last night and am frustrated with myself. I look ahead into the week and can't imagine how it is going to workout.

My chest is constantly tight now. I figure my first heart attack is in the making.

Of Grasshoppers

Student: Master, tonight you speak many words.
Master: Yes.

Of Grasshoppers

Student: My mind is too cluttered. I cannot make a decision.
Master: Would you so be the scared grain of sand that desperately trys to cling to the glass or would you dive boldly into the uncertain vortex purely on faith to past to the other side? Eventually all must pass to the other side.