Monday, May 31, 2004


I asked my folks for help. I didn't like that. I won't do it again and I'm not sure I will accept their help this time.

One step forward, 3 steps backwards

I'm back to cleaning crayons out of clothing.

Incorrect Use Could Result in the Opposite Affect

Where'd it go?
I received this ad in email and found it hilarious!
1) She looks like she's got a package and if she's having to look THAT hard for something in his pants I'd suspect she's using the pills instead of him
2) If he's laughing that hard the pills must of had a reversing affect.

I know that roadrunner is in here!

Fark solicited that this picture be doctored. Below is my stress break doctoring:
Fark Mockup Challenge

Spent the day basically taking a piece of crud poorly written cover letter and turning it into a much nicer letter that may or may not help get me in the door. Trying to finish putting the package together now. Missing one crucial item which could involve mass cleaning or just giving up on it.

Not Pulitzer

The cover letter I had written last week was crap. I've bled on it, slashed it, twisted it, and overall made it something better than a first draft.
I need to work so much harder to learn to keep my mouth shut. There is a reason that the happiest marriages are centered around guys that simply nod their heads and say "yes dear."

Another Google Bomb?

Enter "french military victories" into Google and click the "I'm feeling lucky" button.

Bush and His Lies

This article appears on the front page of the WashingtonPost above the fold! Finally the press stands up! From Bush, Unprecedented Negativity

Scholars and political strategists say the ferocious Bush assault on Kerry this spring has been extraordinary, both for the volume of attacks and for the liberties the president and his campaign have taken with the facts. Though stretching the truth is hardly new in a political campaign, they say the volume of negative charges is unprecedented -- both in speeches and in advertising.
...Bush has outdone Kerry in the number of untruths...
...often they distort Kerry's record and words to undermine the candidate or reinforce negative perceptions of him.
On March 11, the Bush team released a spot saying that in his first 100 days in office Kerry would "raise taxes by at least $900 billion." Kerry has said no such thing...
On Wednesday, a Bush memo charged that Kerry "led the fight against creating the Department of Homeland Security." While Kerry did vote against the Bush version multiple times, it is not true that he led the fight, but rather was one of several Democrats who held out for different labor agreements as part of its creation. Left unsaid is that, in the final vote, Kerry supported the department -- which Bush initially opposed.


My wife is visibly aggrivated by something. I am probably the source but she doesn't want to upset me and won't talk to me about it. I think its more upsetting to know something is going on and not have a clue about it to be able to decide if I could help or not.

Of course, she could just be very focused right now.
A New Day!

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This Morning
"Woke this morning to the sound of thunder..." Helped the dog crawl into bed to be comforted.

That was 4am. Amy whimpered multiple times in the morning but specifically at 2, 4 and 7am.

So far its just a rainy day and time is flying by. I need help from somebody. I'll do anything at this point for a few hundred dollars.

Sunday, May 30, 2004

I continued working on my site complete with updates to Paypal, my php hosting and some research until it came time to take the kids swimming. After swimming we had pizza at the inlaws then returned home with tired kids.


Started getting my hobby website looking more professional. I have several great ideas for the site including some potential money producers.

Lauper - Show Goes On!

Amy helps me Exercise

Amy brought my 5 stages balls so I could juggle!

From the Mouths of Babes

Amy, not yet 2 years old, has started doing something very cute. When we get in the car and start down the road she deliberately checks in my direction and very matter of factly says "Dada seatbelt" and doesn't take her eyes off me until I fasten my seatbelt. She repeats "Dada seatbelt" as necessary. Her enunciation is perfect! After I buckle she sharply turns to the passenger side of the car, points, and says "Mama, seatbelt."

Over 3 decades of being in cars and driving and state law and federal law and the threat of fines could not convince us to regularly use our seatbelts; it took a toddler!

A New Day!

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This Morning
I'm achy this morning. My lack of regular stretching and exercise certainly shows.

I realized yesterday that Monday is a holiday and that means I'm faced with yet another day of no income.

Saturday, May 29, 2004

Just returned from moving soil and eatting dinner at the in-laws. Sore.


I spent $8.50 worth of kerosene to clear a 10x10 area. There has to be a better way!

I bent my pick axe removing more of the sidewalk but am probably in a position to finally plant our new tree. Of course, I really need $200 worth of dirt first. Argh!
Back from buying kerosene. Tried an experimental burn in the front yard. This is going to be quite different than burning with gasoline. I can practically hold a match in the liquid without it firing up.

It's still going to be a nightmare once I start this process. To prevent erosion after I burn everything off I need to buy many bails of hay and several hundred dollars in grass seed and replant the hillside. I still want to cover the entire yard in several dump truck loads of topsoil. I want some leveling to be done. Ugh.. Baby steps. Step 1: get money!


Got my fires stoked! Am heading out to buy a kerosene canister and kerosene. Am going to split tasks between working in the yard, cleaning the office, and programming. Then of course, anything the wife asks me to do.
A New Day!

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This Morning
Woke groggy with a dull throb in my head. Amy was raspy and coughing all night and I'm worried about her. The other kids didn't call even though we asked them to call every night. Not sure if bio dad discourages the calls or if our kids are just that absent minded. Either is a strong possibility.

I am torn between doing the yardwork which would make the sife happy and working on the computer to be able to drive money into this household. I think I will probably work on the yard briefly.

Friday, May 28, 2004

Watched Scooby Doo with the wife. Amy made it through most of it finding the belching and flatuations of Scooby and Shaggy very funny. We of course enjoyed the college humor.

My eyes now itch too much to do anything productive. There is the ghost of the hard working driven me that would take the energy that I do have and stay up most of the night realizing my projects and launching new websites. Right now I think I want a beer and some sleep.

The bank account has gone negative. I wonder if I can convince the bank not to close it. I should stay up finding contract opportunities in Nashville or Atlanta.


Bio dad picked up the 3 older children and the 2 year old got down right offended. We went to Sam's to stock up for the week.

I need a container for some kersene. I think I'm going to burn my yard tomorrow.
Nap for Amy is over. Did Tommy's screaming contribute to a shorter nap? Who knows?


Lunch break has me delayed. Doggone need to eat!


Cover letter written. Extends 1.33 pages but seems appropriate. Will be delivered with support documents this afternoon.

Social networking exercised.

Next step: marketing emails


Eric Clapton Unplugged is helping me get some cover letters and resumes out.


I took the Mensa IQ Test and was very disappointed in my performance. Apparently I was dropped on my head as a baby. Thanks to Alice for the quiz link!

Hypnosis and screams

Noah has been sucked into the tv.

Amy is jolly. Spinning until she falls down, hollering and playing with toys. Occasionally sucked into the tv but can manage to escape its grasp.


Amy goes to the end table where the remote controls are. She picks out the DVD remote control, begins jumping up and down shouting "Elmo Nemo Elmo Nemo Elmo Elmo Elmo" so I put in Elmo in Grouchland and just as it starts up she says "Elmo in Grouchland"! Astounding!

While I am holding her she finds something on my shoulder she doesn't like so she says "Dada eewww Dada eeewww" and swipes her hand at my shoulder to brush it off. I think it was either tears or drool from when I was holding her.


Amy awakes and screams because her shirt is stuck over her head. I get her calmed but she cried for "mama". All is better after some play time.

My muse will leave me before I get word one typed.


I know you aren't supposed to use sarcasm with kids and that it is a difficult concept for them to get and you really don't want them using sarcasm; however, it is somewhat amusing to converse with Noah with an occasional sarcastic remark. He is so literal!

N: dropping spoon on floor, dropping cereal bowl on counter
D: "Noah, do you think you could make a little more noise?"
N: pauses, turns head, looks confused "Did you say 'more'?"
D: "Yes" pause. explanation ensues

Cicada Talk

Thanks to my brother and NPR I don't have to record the Cicada's. As a matter of fact, NPR has gone a step further and translated the Cicada talk!

A New Day!

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This Morning
The muse has me but Amy is up. I think I'll let her play in the room while I try to get this cover letter written.

Last Night
I was torn between wanting to work on the computer and lie in bed. A decent laptop would have come in handy. I diddled on the computer for a bit then wasted time watching the History Channel about recovering lost airplanes.

Thursday, May 27, 2004

Cleared more of the sidewalk while cooking dinner. Would have probably gotten further but I overloaded the wheelbarrow and the wheel went flat. Removing the rest of the sidewalk should go quickly. What in the world am I to do with all this cement?

After dinner Amy and I went for a nice walk. Cathy volunteered me to do it as a bribe to Amy. I stressed for a second then enjoyed the walk.
What's 'appen'd ta da Int'rnet? Tis slow as one o' Auntie Perls steries.


I haven't done a thing and I'm tired. I need a nap.

Ah! Naked toddler...

Enjoying the kids

I enjoyed a tea party with Amy, then Noah's friend's mother and sister arrived to pick him up. Fortunely I had the boys wash their hands, arms, knees, legs and feet when they came in so they were pretty clean. I should have cleaned their shoes.

Tommy rose for a snack, was denied and returned to his room.

Amy just threw her tea pot away.

From the Mouths of Babes

"Swipper swipping. He's hiding."


Amy woke talkative. She said "My bot fell down" because her pacifier had fallen, or been pushed, out of the crib and between the crib and the wall.

8 year olds acting like...well...8 year olds!

I blinked and the boys were digging holes in the ditch. Nothing better than becoming reputable as the household that lets your kids cover over and get stinkin muddy. Wasn't this the same friend that mud happened to last time?

To Blog or Not to Blog?

Is this blogging on such a personal level a bad idea?
Certainly I've spilled much information that is not readily available about me; however, nothing I write is information that I would not willingly disclose in person. I lived a lot of my life being very careful to reveal as little about myself and my philosophies to those around me. My thinking was: Why trouble them with too much information about me? Why not get privilege by allowing them to make certain assumptions about my wealth, capabilities, etc? Simple answer: karmic debt, honesty, right from wrong, and so forth. Why not share information? To really know a person is to build trust.

I enjoy my life. I take pleasure in thinking that others might enjoy it also. Of course, the biggest bonus of the blog is that relatives who might get a call once a week or every few weeks and friends that would otherwise get a call a quarter or maybe a call around Christmas are now able to keep up with us day to day and share in the laughs and empathise with the challenges.

Shouldn't life be more private?
Life happens once. I missed out on stories from family members and friends that are now dead and gone. I would love to read their lives. Perhaps one day my great grandchildren will enjoy some insight into my life and what it was like to live during these times.

Isn't it crazy to reveal your debts? Isn't that no ones business?
99% of my life is focused on getting out of debt. My day to day decisions are driven by my ability or inability to pay for something. My debt will decide if my kids go to college, decide if I get to retire, decide if I can provide extra opportunities for my family and so much more. The bulk of my stress is centered around the trap of high interest credit cards, the threats of lawsuits, loss of property, dollar driven lack of self-esteem in my children, debtors prison, etc. Why should my story of my battle with debt not be public? Hopefully it will come with a happy ending that doesn't involve a lottery ticket. Any potential employer can pull my credit report. It's all there.

Why not pick a topic and focus on your expertise? An online magazine effectively?
I could greatly enjoy that. However, that would be a different blog for a different purpose and right now I don't have the luxury of adding that to my plate. I would expect a greater level of organization and effort from myself for such a publication.

Can't this negatively affect your opportunities for jobs?
Most definitely! My writing is frequently negative. It's easier to write when one is down. Look at all our most famous writers. They were depressed druggies and alcoholics running out to the woods to escape their troubles. For every negative thought I put down on paper or in a blog I have dozens of happy thoughts to counter it. I like to keep the happy thoughts in my head and let the negative ones out so they do hang around to trouble me. As for affecting jobs, peoples attitudes toward me, etc, well that's just something they have to live with. My writing doesn't change my talents and abilities. I'm not going to do something stupid like write about company secrets or risk breaching security by publishing work related information. I could easily see a hiring manager using the blog as an excuse to not hire; that would be dumb on their part. I'm a hard worker. Nothing changes that.

I am certainly never going to be running for president. I have not the lack of morals, the money, nor the education for such a position. The worst thing that could happen is that I get a job in Oak Ridge that requires a clearance and the blog comes into question.

Are you bothered that your enemies might revel in your hardships?
What enemies? And who cares?

Aren't you wasting a lot of time?
Sometimes. But usually I blog when I'm otherwise unable to be working on anything else. Or I do it as that smaller reward for completing a task. I think anytime "wasted" is made up in staying in touch with those important to me, better communications with my wife, and having a searchable archive of my life. I have used my blog to look up dates and times of things that have happened as the information was needed in a phone call or a meeting. It makes for a great documentation tool.

Who asked these questions?
:) I did. I thought it funny. I also tried to imagine myself being interviewed say by some investigative reporter.

Physics lessons

Brain Stud Noah is in the street playing hockey with his friend. His friend refused to wear Sarah's rollerblades so he was in shoes while Noah was skating. Noah removes the skates and chooses to play barefoot.

Pick your battles Dad! I think this one has its own lesson.

Summer buddies

One of Noah's friends has joined us.
Tommy rises and in his words "just in time for lunch"

Nap time

Amy choses to nap. Tommy remains napping.

Girls off to play

Cathy and Sarah are off to Libby Lu's to get made-up with the rest of her girl scout troop. This is their final activity until the fall.

I'm at home with a weepy Amy. She smashed her finger badly. I'm surprised she didn't loose the tip of it! The tylenol appears to have kicked in and Dora the Explorer is helping. It will be nap time soon.

Noah is watching Dora with Amy and he's participating.

Tommy returned to bed when his biological father called. I said "Hello _____" and Tommy ran to his room and hid under his covers. He has not come back out yet and that was over an hour ago.

Since yer gonna look anyway....

Danish IT firm gives workers free Net porn

...set a new benchmark in worker welfare by handing its workers free subscriptions to Net porn sites. The company hopes that the freebies will stop randy Scandinavian employees from accessing Web smut while at work.
Good concept but it probably just means that the employees will have better quality pictures to look at while at work...

A New Day!

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This Morning
Got on the horn to tech support to try to get wife's email recovered. Keep yer fingers crossed.

I feel almost hungover this morning. I guess I didn't sleep well. Head throbbing. Eyes blurry. Had really bizarre dreams. The memorable one was action adventure style in full color centered around a mysterious museum with myself as a law enforcement agent partnered with a female law enforcement agent trying to prevent this guy who also claimed to be law enforcement from stealing some artifact with mysterious powers. (too much television).

Last Night
Horrific experience as Amy fell head first from her sister's bed. She's ok. Sarah was very upset.

Wednesday, May 26, 2004


Spent the afternoon catching up with an old college friend and helping clean her computer of adware.

Diamond in the Rough?

Finally got the wife's email working with some caveats. The engineers still need to grab the email off the other box and get it imported to the new one. She hasn't lost anything but just doesn't have access to it. Any new email should come in fine.

Next, I have a decision to make. I friend has extended a generous offer to host our domains that would result in basically $120/mth savings. Crazy not to do it! My "set in his ways" attitude makes me uncomfortable jumping from a hosting situation I am comfortable with. Other people jump regularly. Bah! Time to get over oneself and do the right thing. Now I just have to bring my bill current with my current host so that they will not block the switch.


Went to Home Depot and bought the hardware to finish up the bathroom as far as towel holders go. Also bought supplies to get these plants in the ground. Was quick and felt productive.

Software Development Life Cycle

All software people need this displayed in their offices. That would be project managers, programmers, qa people, etc. Software Development Life Cycle

A New Day!

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This Morning
Up not quite as early as I'd hoped but up none-the-less. Last night I began designing a product I'd like to design, build and sell but will need a little angel investor to be friendly to be to make it happen. I'm going to try to write it up as best I can. It may even be patentable.

I'm in the programming mindset right now. I could even be focused enough to do some mundane tasks like business cards and marketing. However, I promised myself I would be at HomeDepot right now so I'm off. Going to spend the next several hours getting those plants in the ground (provided my wife is up to tell me where they go). Finish the game!

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

Had pizza for dinner and considered a run to HomeDepot for planting supplies. They open at 7am. I'll try to be there right when they open, get the plants in the ground and then get to work.

Watched "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" with the entire family cuddled up on the couch. The movie was everything I expected it to be...which would be a somewhat waste of talent.


Is it photoshopped? Or is Kerry's daughter assuming he's in the White House already and trying to keep up with the naughty Bush girls? (Kerry's daughter stouting a see through dress, no bra, but she is wearing panties. Note: this appears in The Sun a British tabloid.)

3 Legged Race

Running naked through the streets of San Francisco will be OK and not OK, according to the people in charge of the Bay to Breakers race.

Last year, there were more than 200 nude runners.
she was told by police that it is "not physically possible'' to cite nudists in motion.

Learn about yourself - but be careful!

Self knowledge just a click away - Personality tests proliferate on the Web

For seekers of self-knowledge, there's a plethora of online personality tests that will help gauge everything from weighty matters like what type of mate or career would be best for you, to more frivolous concerns such as whether your personality is more like that of a Golden Retriever or a Chihuahua.
the Web site closely guards customer privacy and does not give users' personal information to third parties.

Big Brother - Big Trouble

Man fights citation for carrying anti-Bush sign

A southwestern Wisconsin man is fighting a civil citation for bringing a sign that read "F U G W" with him as he watched President Bush pass through Platteville last week.
Police then handcuffed him and took him to the police station, where he was photographed, fingerprinted, cited $243 for disorderly conduct and released.


Semi-permanent Literature

Story is tattoo much
This author has written a story and will have 2095 volunteers each tattoo one word of the story on any part of their body of their choosing. The completed work will never be revealed to the public. Only the participants will know the story. The author wonders if a caste system will evolve around the "the"s, "a"s and "and"s.

"There is something wonderfully melancholic about a piece of writing that's living flesh and finally dies and is grieved over.
It is a revolution in literature.
Note: This article appears in The Sun a British Tabloid. Confirm your sources.

Lawn Monster Ate My Mower

Ran over a stump trying to bush hog the hill with the lawn mower. Having already discovered a door hinge, large sticks, a 4x4, and several other foreign objects the blade sighed heavily and bent at a 90 degree angle.

The other lawn mower still won't run. I think the fuel line is clogged.

Switched to Round Up. Those hand pumps bite.

Tech Supporting

Still trying to address my wife's email problem.


Had a meeting with a client to discuss an ecommerce system. Thrilling conversation. Left tired but jazzed.


Updated resume sent to a recruiter that I thought had given up on me.

Indignant Cat

My cat rolled over in her sleep and fell off the monitor onto the keyboard full-sizing Mozilla. Stood their on the keyboard for a second trying to figure out where she was then hopped right back on the monitor. Her antics are enough that I'd consider not getting a flat panel monitor. It's nice to have the gargoyle helping me code.


Dropped in on a recruiter I contacted in Dec and visited in Jan then never heard from again. We discussed that I was still in the system and how the rates in Knoxville for certain skills like DBA work have plummeted. So a dba making $85k 3 years ago might only get $55k today.

I don't completely buy that picture but instead of writing them off I encouraged them to market me in different ways and changed my salary expectations.

Bored computer geeks


Email sent to friend begging referrals.

Being productive

Updated resume at resume and work samples.

Got information to someone in Israel that is referring me to work with someone in the UK on an hourly contract. I love this small world!

Got pricing questions answered for a product that I can resell. This is probably my best avenue for restablishing myself complete with residual income potential. It's pretty much a product I wanted to develop without me having to put the time and effort into the development and instead being able to focus on the sales and support--what? You mean exactly what I've been asking for?!
Why does EVERYTHING take so much unnecessary extra effort for me?!
Poverty is a trap. Once you get in a situation all the energy that you need to get out of that situation has to go into defending that situation or explaining that situation making it near impossible to overcome. Of course, all the people with the money want this.

The day starts! Or does it?

So the wife is up and I feel like the day is shot. The productive part of my morning when my mind is least cluttered is gone. At this point I am unfocused and thoughts are racing.

Thought I would immediately leave to talk to a recruiter that isn't working for me to try to find out about other possible "real" headhunters in town; however, I have to do support now. This support is caused by the combination of an email server migration at the host and my lack of ability to pay the bill. or so I bet. This should turn the day to hell.

As I am holding Amy I ask "Hand game?" but she doesn't seem interested so I start to put her down and that sweet voice screams "Nooo Hand!" She wanted to do the hand game! Not her longest time or best form though. Her's "Nooos" need to be recorded because it's got an "e" in there somewhere. Like "Neoow". Posted by Hello

From the Mouths of Babes

I start making Amy waffles. As they cook in the toaster I walk to the pantry to get a funnel and the waffles pop up so Amy in a confident and excited voice says "WaAffulls!" then looks and me and says "Go Dada Go! Go Dada Go!"

I guess she was hungry :)

As I am cutting the waffles she pulls open a draw that contains knives and I say "Close it" and she cheerfully replies "OOh K!" and pushes the drawer shut. Such a good child!

Prior to all this her brother Noah called to her "Amy. Sit beside Oah. Sit beside Oah." She ran to be by his side in the rocking chair. She sat calmly for several minutes watching him play gameboy. She loves him so much and he loves her so much. I know they will always be there for each other!

Flights of Fancy

I should enlist the aid of my wife to cold call businesses on web designs all day while I target people and businesses I know. We'd need a sitter to pull that off.
A New Day!

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This Morning
I want to hit the ground running but I have to care for the children for a bit.

Amy had a blowout and very messy diaper. I haven't checked her bedding yet but while I am changing her on the couch a sleeping Sarah extends her feet and starts pushing at Amy. Thanks for the help! It was rather funny because if she was awake she would have not had her body much less her foot so close to such a mess. Noah declared "That's the messiest diaper I've ever seen! I'm not throwing that one away!"

Amy's in great spirits and enjoying playing with this toy that looks like a bunch of neon worms glued together in the center.

Noah is always jolly and happily playing Gameboy.

Tommy and I had a run-in so he's back in bed. I went upstairs and he was dressed in Noah's room on his elbows and knees with butt up in the air just staring at a flashlight. When I questioned him on why he had not brought his medicine down and asked him to get it he just lay there swaying his rear slowly for side to side so I gave it a tap with my foot and he went ballistic.

Last Night
Tommy and I played Dungeons and Dragons from 6pm-10pm. He was so well behaved and controlled that we had a great time and were able to play for that length of time! I was astounded and enjoyed myself very much.

I came home and instead of following my schedule I lay in bed with the wife and we learned how to use the Cable's new video on demand system. After a decade or more of people talking about it.. the system is finally here and works great! We can start, stop, rewind and fast forward movies, music videos, regular television programs like DIY and Home and Garden, and more. It's really cool!

Monday, May 24, 2004

Gone to play D&D. I've actually had a fun time putting together my character despite failing to accomplish my days goals and am looking forward to the intellectual stimulation.

Cleaned house

Vaccuumed and mopped the entire upstairs. Slacked a little toward the end on Noah and Sarah's room because of the abundant quantity of small toys that might have gotten eatten. House smells better. Other than getting sweaty in the clothes I planned to wear tonight I feel good.
Printing character sheets for Tommy for AD&D ed 2 he should be thrilled.
Made a schedule and am fairly on task for the moment.


I'm drowning in chaos.

Neighbors with bats, sticks capture suspected child predator

Neighbors with bats, sticks capture suspected child predator

"They also accused him of hugging a 12-year-old boy on Saturday while he was wearing women's clothing."
If a 12 yr old boy is going to wear women's clothing he should expect to get hugged by grown men.
"The homeowner called police and pleaded with the crowd to not harm the man."
(subthought of homeowner... I don't have the money or time for a lawsuit from this criminal. take him to someone else's yard if you are going to beat him)
"...officers said residents shouldn't take the law into their own hands."
(subthought of officers... we fear for our jobs or paycuts when the tax payers realize they don't really need us now do they!)

The Breast Test

Our son is over weight and has breasts bigger than some maturing teenage girls. So, here is a link to let you test yourself to see if you can tell a man's chest from a woman's (Not Safe for Work! Adult Content!)
I've been tasked.
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This Morning
I've got that "I want to drill a hole in my head" sensation this morning. I can tell that when I get older and start losing my mind that they are going to have to take all my power tools away.

After returning from camping, my wife misinterprets my urgent desires to de-tick as grumpiness and things go downhill from there.

For stress relieve we do some necessary shopping; for comic relieve while loading the groceries in the car Cathy and Sarah are looking around for the honey dew melon. When I get out to help look a gentleman walking by says "Looking for your melon? We drove past it as it rolled way down there." Cathy had put it by her feet and it rolled the entire length of the parking lot without sustaining damage!

Sunday, May 23, 2004

Confused cat. Posted by Hello
In the car I got myself psyched up about coming back to the house and working my tail off. Now that I'm here I just want to go to bed.
Somehow we missed ozone so we will be home in 20 minutes


Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer
On the road. Taking highway 70 instead me the interstate. Will stop at ozone falls.


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Campsite cleaned. At lodge for breakfast.


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Noah and tommy appear tick free. Crossed fingers. Already packed. Getting ready for breakfast.
Noah wide awake. Two more ticks crawling up my leg. There must be a nest nearby
Stoked the fire. Wide awake but going un try for more sleep.
I found one bit into noahs stomach as he was changing last night.


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So i found two more ticks. Both in my groin and one so tiny i almost mistook it for a mole. They were both bit in.
I do not feel like sleeping.


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I love being a dad!


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The unseen goose complaining of my presence was a little startling.


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Saturday, May 22, 2004

Silence brings jumping fish, crickets, and little of anything else save occasionally a man made sound.
Perfect night air. Some clouds. Bright stars. The view from the dock entrancing. The sounds of silence melodic.
Kids asleep. I am not sure about me.


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Rain gone


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Score my 4th or 5th tick
Thundering since 2. Rain finally here.
Sitting on the dock of the bay - fishing with noah and friends
Wonderful afternoon
First noah incident. Changing clothes now. Yes we are using bug spray. Check user djuggler for some camp pictures.


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Third tick


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Within the first hour i scored two ticks. Now happy with long pants
Yelling instructions for an hour over the banging of 20 hammers and my voice is gone.
Non of my first aid supplies. First injury results in a 10 minute walk for a bandage
Forgot shorts. Hot hot hot! Forgot some preferred gear.
Arrived just in time for opening ceremonies.
Just left interstate
Jeep noise bothering noah not tommy.
40 minutes late to start 40 miles to drive. Bad dad.


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When I am "doing" things are good. When I am not doing things are real bad. Basically if I have too much time to think I flip out. Right now I am sorting clothes. Granted I'm nearing our deadline to leave the house and we are not ready but that doesn't have me paniced the way I was before I was sorting clothes.

Doing is good.
A New Day!

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This Morning
Today is the camping trip. As is typical of my style lately, I am ill prepared. My wife worked hard to gather our things last night but I had no energy to help her or to finish the packing so now I am frantic to pack--actually, I am not frantic. I am calm but disappointed in myself.

I cannot get my mind off of money..the lack of money and my inability to generate money quickly. I'm a bit freaked.

Friday, May 21, 2004

I feel like even the most simple things in my life are turned into unnecessarily complicated tasks. Something that should require 3 minutes turns into 30 minutes of phone calls and hassle always.
My voice isn't here. It's more like there isn't enough air in my lungs to make a voice. It's quite irritating.

I want to just go to sleep but there is so much to do. Focus. One thing at a time.

Another exasperation

Just came down to use the computer to try to express my feelings about a regular occurance in our house only to trip for the 4th time today over something in our basement that is covered in dirty clothes only then to find that the evening sun has entered the window by my desk all buy making the computer unusable.

My initial response was to simply go upstairs and prepare dinner which is what I'm supposed to be working on anyhow.

Comfortably Numb

It's incredibly numbing to constantly be faced with apparently insurmountable tasks. It's one thing to have your day to day life then have it interupted with a burst water pipe but to have live day to day with multiple water pipes bursting and sometimes have them bursting faster than you can fix them is overwhelming. Such is my life!

Noah came home today with his Polo shirt signed by one of his friends in permanent ink. Apparently lots of kids had worn Tee shirts to school just for this activity. No problem, I have a concoction in the garage that will take care of it. Hmm. There's the rub. The garage has become this unbearable monster and I can't find the Goo. I have other cleaners but at this point I become so overwhelmed and depressed at the state of the garage that I cannot motivate myself to fix the shirt.

Ok. Let's schedule a day and just clean the garage. umm. Well. This weekend is out. We are camping. And that brings us to the weekday which means I should spend every waking moment trying to bring in income. Of course, that needs to be interspersed with the regular day to day needs of cleaning, raising kids, cooking, emergencies, home maintenance and repair.

I want to cook but the kitchen is trashed from Cathy and I being completely dysfunctionally sick for 2 days. Ok. So let's make a start. Let's put the groceries she just bought away. Um. No counterspace. Head throb.


My stomach is still tender but I think I've made a decent recovery. Now I'm looking outside at the beautiful weather thinking "I'll not get to enjoy this when I'm working from an office" and debating what I should be doing 1) sales calls on a Friday --ugly 2) planting plants or 3) cleaning my office/finances

A New Day!

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This Morning
I am feeling so much better. The achiness has mostly subsided. The nausea is gone. I have even ventured into eatting. Last night I had chicken broth, crackers, and grapes. This morning it was oat meal and a fruit cup.

I have to think only of the moment and do one thing at a time to keep from becoming totally freaked.

This weekeend is a boy scout camping trip. Originally it was to be Noah, Tommy and myself. I'd like to keep it that way but I'm not sure that I will have the strenght to deal with Tommy in his current state of crankiness. Sarah may end up going instead of Tommy.

Thursday, May 20, 2004

Strength attempts a return.


Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer
Fighting nausea and breathing is very labored. Considered the emergency room but an uninsured poor person I cannot afford health.

Wednesday, May 19, 2004


I don't know what is going on with my throat but it feels like something is stuck in it like a chicken bone. I suspect that it is scratched. It is the most uncomfortable feeling I can imagine.
Kids beat parents 5 to 4 but i did score on noah


Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer
Parent and child soccer. This could hurt.


Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer
Iep went relatively well. Tommy is still in for a rough year next year.


Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer
I feel like i have a stick stuck in my throat.
Sanitized the tub. That felt good. Took a bath. That felt good. Still have a very sore throat. That feels bad.
10:38am. I am focused on clearing up the laundry and trying to get the bathroom usable again. I really want a bath. Mostly have accomplished nothing so far other than telling MBNA that there is nothing to give them.

Cat's Next Kill

Prairie DogI just watched a prairie dogground hog mosey through our back yard! It was a big as a fat house cat with a tail like a dogs.

Stressed Relations

I forgot to mention that I unfairly bit into Cathy last night. I try to teach Tommy despite his handicap and I feel I know where his limits are and I frequently push the limits on purpose. I snapped at Cathy telling her "No matter how I treat Tommy I always get lectured. If I am mean to him or if I am nice to him I get lectured." She disagrees with many of my methods and feels that I am always angry with Tommy and that I hate him. I need to try harder to not hear her words as a "lecture" but rather as a request on how to handle Tommy differently for everyone's happiness.

Last night Cathy mentioned that she feels she has to "choose between Tommy and [I]" and that's not fair of me to have put her in that situation.

Spent - Beat Down

A New Day!

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This Morning
My eyes itch. My throat is sore. I can't breathe through my nose and I feel like I've swallowed cotton.

You know. A little earlier this morning I was relating to how a seriously injured person must feel in the hospital bed. I mean, they have to have fight to keep going. If it is serious, part of the ability to recover is going to be that person's desire, conscious or unconscious, to keep going. This morning I was not so sure that if I were to be seriously injured that I would have the will to keep going. That sounds ridiculous coming out of me because I've always taken blows well. I have had many people in my life describe me as a pillar of strength for them. I need a good turn. Murph seems to be setting me up badly.

At 1am this morning I was still awake. I was wide awake but had a heavy feeling of exhaustion. I could not tell if I was truly tired and unable to sleep because of anxiety or if I was truly awake and unable to motivate myself because of depression. I finally convinced myself that it would be better to rest and get up early than to work now and be too tired to get up and help the kids prepare for school.

At 4:10 I hear movement upstairs. I go upstairs to have Tommy say "I think I threw up?" I find humor in that statement. How could you not be sure if you threw up. And man! Did he ever throw up! We spent the next hour with Tommy reluctantly cleaning up his mess. Then of course I finished cleaning it. During this time Tommy wakes the baby. She gets comforted by myself and my wife on 3 occasions before she finally returns to sleep.

At 5am, I debate staying up and my wife wisely encourages me to get some more sleep.

At 5:25 Tommy is throwing up again. This time it is mostly water as he gulped down half a liter. I put him to sleep in the bathroom with a promise to wake him and move him in half an hour when his siblings are preparing for school.

At 7:45 Tommy is complaining of being thirsty but before I can offer him "regulated sips" of water he is forcing himself to gag trying to throw up. This was an attempt to force himself to heave. I don't yet dare to give him his medicine.

We have another IEP at 2pm the result of which will be us needing to start a class action lawsuit--a little hard to do when you need to pull $5-10k/mth and are making $0. This promises to be a fun day! Between 8am (now) and 2pm [6 hours] I have to prepare for the IEP [.5 hour], deal with Amy (that is diaper changes, breakfast and some play time) [1 hour], bathe [.5 hour], wash a pukey sleeping bag[.25 hour], clean the kitchen and floors [2 hours], sending marketing materials to people that I promised they'd have on Monday [.75 hour], contact more potential clients [1.5 hour], send resumes and cover letters to jobs that were advertized in Sunday's paper [3 hours], contact job leads that I've already interviewed with or been in contact [1 hour], contact the cell phone customer service to get an extension on the bill [.25 hour], program [8 hours], and do enough of the finances to figure out if I am in danger of having my checking account closed [12 hours].
[Total Hours: 30.75 hours]

Last Night
I was starving but we didn't get out of the house in time to get food. We rushed to Sarah's 5th grade musical program. The program was their wrapup of their 6 years (3 for Sarah--can you believe that!) at the school. The gym hot, noisy and uncomfortable. Fortunately we left Tommy at home but that would come back to haunt us later. I walked the length of the school 5 times getting cokes for Cathy, Noah, Amy and myself. I welcomed the opportunity to be outside when Amy couldn't take any more.

Some bozo made a dvd of pictures with powerpoint style transitions and a music track. I would have chosen the music different, probably picking hits from the years that the pictures were being shown. I feel like we are constantly being shafted by the school. We volunteer our time at the school. We participate. We interact with the teachers. Yet we continuously get grief or left out. All of our pictures are digital so when I was told about the dvd I inquired and said "do you really need hard copies?" and was told "the guy doing the video needs to scan them in and I replied that "they are already digital and will save him effort." I was told "he doesn't know how to deal with that" and later was told he could. We sent our pictures as fuzzy printouts labeled with the filename of the respective file on a cd we burned. Not a single one of our pictures ended up on the dvd. Sarah was in it twice and that was simply because she was in group shots that other parents provided. Shafted! Morons! I could have printed the pictures on photopaper and let them get scanned in. In hindsight I suppose this is what I should have done. I cannot help but think because of the pathethic economic situation I have placed my family into continues to unfairly hold us back.

we returned from the program to find that Tommy had blatantly raided the kitchen. Food crumbs were all over the couch. The television remote was uncomfortably sticky as was the phone, door knob, and most other things I touched. Tommy had so much sugar and junk food that he would later lose his stomach.

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Washington Speaks!

This is too funny not to post..
Politician Penis Sizes


Before the Cicadas are done, I have to figure out a way to get a decent recording of the noise. It really and truly sounds like a flying saucer from HG Wells War of the Worlds is going to come over the tree line from the horizon. In the immediate vacinity it sounds like thousands of crickets screaming in pain.

Pediatrician Warns Parents About Cicadas

"We had a stab wound to the arm from a kid who was trying to kill a cicada on the arm of another child but unfortunately he was using a knife," ...
...a boy trying to swat a cicada out of the air with a baseball bat instead hit his friend in the nose...

Took a 1 hour break to clear some of the yard. That felt good but afterwards my stomach started to ache. I laid down in bed half in agony, half in anxiety. Finally rose and bathed in preparation for tonight's 5th grade musical event.

Throat is sore as all get out.
I have to shift. Going to work in the yard for an hour then return to drop some resumes.


Crappy piece of marketing created. I need to get something out to folks I promised to send information to so this will have to do for the moment. I am capable of so much better.
Today I feel worthless..

Travel Safer with Your Disposal Camera

Feeling a little insecure at the airport without your nail clippers to aid you in your defense? Fear no more! Convert your disposable camera into a stun gun! Thanks MacGyver!

The video is a must watch!


This one is dedicated to my wife for her addiction to the beverage (you guess which one) and to my old school chums for being so kind to me such that I never ended up in such a predicament: Sometimes...


Mexican government covers up UFO sighting with what? Naturally the weather.

Send in the Clowns!

Where are the clowns?

"We are facing a dire shortage of clowns," ...
The Aqua Jesters, founded in 1946, has shrunk from a steady pool of more than 100 clowns to about 50. The average age is 56, and only about 20 members are active -- not nearly enough clowns to meet all the requests from festivals, hospitals and charity events.

Download the Internet

Thanks to Tim for this link! Time to get your backup of the Internet!

Political Read of the Day

Cold Turkey by Kurt Vonnegut Excellent read!

If some of you still haven’t decided, I’ll make it easy for you.

If you want to take my guns away from me, and you’re all for murdering fetuses, and love it when homosexuals marry each other, and want to give them kitchen appliances at their showers, and you’re for the poor, you’re a liberal.

If you are against those perversions and for the rich, you’re a conservative.

What could be simpler?
Special thanks to My Likes and Dislikes for the link!

From the Mouths of Babes

"Dad Nemo.. OH KAY!"

Patotoe Cannon

I've been procrastinating on getting permission to reproduce this page so I'll just post the link. A fantastic read! I've played with just such a cannon and they really are awesome ... and dangerous! The Splorg Potato Cannon Project

This page chronicles the construction of a potato launcher (potato cannon, spud cannon, spud gun, tator tot bazooka -- whatever you want to call it) by a group of friends from Orange County, California.

US Medicine has to change!

"As a bonus; I live in Canada so it was all free. We don't even see any paperwork for non-elective surgeries." Free?! And no paperwork!! I'm moving to Canada! (bonus on the beer..and super bonus on their approach to the environment)

Eye Twitch

My Wife has an eye twitch wink wink

From the Mouths of Babes

"I love you Dada"


When I am in the mood to work and have the energy to work, I can't work due to external factors.
A New Day!

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This Morning
Woke at 4 as usual but could not convince myself to get out of bed.
Woke again at 6. There is this movie that I have a memory of about Jesus. It shows him healing a blind man. The man's eyes look as if they have be encrusted with sand. I guess a more accurate discription would be that the prop man put half a walnut shell in each eye. Jesus then washed the sand away and returned the man's vision. That's what my eyes feel like right now.

Noah, the morning child, would not stay in bed. Got himself up at 6:30 and had breakfast. Wisely returned to bed to play Gameboy.

Amy announced herself right about 6:55.

Got myself prepared for an interview. Joined Cathy, Tommy, Noah and Amy for a doctor's appointment. Had lunch with them. Then was off to my interview. I thought it went rather well and I was actually complimented on my interview skills. That's quite a turn-a-round since the days of interviewing to be an Resident Assistant in college. Thank you Cindy Hieky!

Returning from the interview I skirted around a storm in the Jeep. It's amazing how aware of weather you become driving a convertible.

In the evening I conducted the Aspie Support group and we had a great turnout with some fantastic conversation!

Monday, May 17, 2004

A New Day!

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This Morning
Head stuffy. Woke at 4am and couldn't convince myself to get out of bed. Alarm at 5 was silenced quickly. At 6am Sarah was roused and Noah was told to stay in bed (pink eye!). I returned to bed to find the most comfortable spot, pose and warmth imaginable only to stare at the clock watching the minutes count down. I cheated and gave Tommy medicine at 6:35 and found Sarah asleep on the couch. Noah has even returned to sleep.

This weekend wiped us all out. We played and worked so hard!

Tommy got to school only to be sent home because he had "scratched his face until it bleed." So naturally I drove out to get him. Both boys have a doctor's appointment at 10:45 this morning.

Time to work.

Saturday, May 15, 2004

Partly Found

I found the bag but the batteries aren't in it.

Lost my mind because I just realized I was supposed to be helping the wife do some planning last night when I fell asleep! Ugh again!

Constantly Lost

I can't find anything in this house and I'm as much to blame as anyone else. I need the rechargable batteries so that we can take pictures at today's party. I need to be able to put a charge on the batteries. Ugh!
A New Day!

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This Morning
Slept like a rock last night. This morning I did some dumbbell exercises after getting Noah to bathe.

Today we are celebrating 4 birthday parties: Noah (8), Sarah (11), Amy (2), and Gabriel (2). There should be honorable mentions to Cathy (?), Jeni (?) and it seems like I am overlooking Carmen (?).

Noah has the unstopable internal clock. He gets up between 6am and 6:30 whether he needs to or not and has this blank look on his face like "why isn't everyone else up?"

Friday, May 14, 2004

Spent the afternoon cleaning the kitchen and the bathroom. Seems that I never get beyond those two rooms but I did a pretty thorough job.

Relatives came over and we have the unusual pleasure of entertaining guests at our house--I mean people stayed at our house for a lengthy time without being scared away! And we only had 2 carpenter ants show up.

The afternoon and evening were quite pleasurable.

I'm still developing an ulcer over lack of income. I'm in the uncomfortable situation of having a potential contract that has to be exclusive but being faced with the possibility that it may fall through so I have to market myself right up to the point that I accept the contract.

The Matrix is Here!

Robotic Sentinels to Protect Water Supplies from Terrorists

"Not too far off, though, this technology will be able to serve as an early warning system, a network of robotic sentinels, to protect our waterways from terrorist attacks,"


Metal using velcro like properties to bond stronger with other metals

Like joining two pieces of Velcro, TWI says it can bond a metal to a composite simply by pressing them together. The carbon fibres in the composite wrap tightly around the protrusions, creating a firm bond without any kind of glue.


Wahoo! I've gotten of my rear - too little too late as usual - and am making phone calls to drive contracts to me.

Caught up

Fantastic! I've caught up electronically a bit. That feels good. Now to return to some brief cleaning then I'll make some phone calls.

For your blogroll

For you Google afficionados: GoogleBlog


For those programmers seeking a cheaper solution to the features that BrowserHawk offers, try BrowserSpy.

Take your pictures while you can

Congress targets cell phone camera peeping Toms Ok. Posting pictures without permission should not be allowed. Good down to earth morals should keep people from taking pictures say in a locker room or bathroom. I should not be prevented from taking calls in a locker room or bathroom. Too much of my life depends on receiving text messages and phone calls. If some urgent matter comes up and I'm taking 30-45 minutes in the locker room to enjoy a shower or steam room or sauna I should still be able to receive my calls despite the little camera on the phone. If someone wants to take pictures in the locker room they darn well will sneak camera in.

Once again, our fantastic society makes life hellish by threating the symptoms and not the problem.

Hometown News

Terrorists Attack Cape Fear Museum with 150 Year Old Ordnance

...a contractor working on the water front brought in a Civil War canon ball as a donation to the museum. A good gesture, but what he didn't know is that the canon ball had a round of shot with the fuse still intact.


Mexican Air Force pilots film unidentified objects

"This is historic news," Maussan told reporters. "Hundreds of videos (of UFOs) exist, but none had the backing of the armed forces of any country. ... The armed forces don't perpetuate frauds."
In other news, Mexican Airforce Makes Decision to Disallow Pilots From Taking that 'Relaxing Shot of Tequillia' Just Before Take-off Due to 'Abuse Issues' and Non-regulation of 'Shot Size' as well as 'Finding Empty Bottles in Fighter Jets'.

Steak and BJ Day

Steak and BJ Day - March 14th I stumbled across this and realized we'd missed an important holiday this year. So ladies, and guys, mark your calendars for March 14th 2005 so you don't miss it next year.

This link not safe for work. Contains sexual content.


Forget Atkins! Get your pet fat!

Video games get raunchy

Animated sex? Naked women? Streakers? They're all in this year's crop of upcoming titles.
You know.. Even when games were nothing more than text they were riddled with sex. And if they weren't, I recall being able to construe them into being sexual. Hormonal teens will make it happen one way or another. Today's games are just better quality sex!

Tech Support

The father-in-law dropped by and we took apart one of his phones to try to get a working one again. A coke got spilled on the mother-in-law's phone and it fizzled. That phone was from Verizon (the crappiest phone company on the planet. Do NOT use Verizon!). They have an identical phone from Sprint (no longer have Spring service). Model numbers are identical! Anyhow, Verizon won't flash the Sprint phone and those phones don't use sim cards so they are stuck with a working phone but cannot get the service.

They are going to end up buying a new phone and I bet their contract gets extended to at least 2006. Phone companies are getting to be about as crooked as credit card companies.

From the Mouths of Babes

Amy is a riot. She goes to a chair and slaps the seat with her hand and says "Sit Daddi Sit"

Later she comes to me and I think she is say 'look dada a ball' then she drops from her hand a blank ant and says "Look dada a bug!" She is quite proud of herself but I jump and scare her. Oops. I told her "good job" and we high fived.


I know why I can't get out of bed even though I'm awake. My mind races with the hundreds of things I need to be doing and I can't decide what to do so I go back to sleep. From now on, I will set a "get up early goal" before going to bed. I will say "if I get up early, this is what I will work on.."
Blast! Amy is awake. She is now suppose to rise for another 1.5 hours or more. I need to look in that room anyway for the medicine.

Found it! Tommy obviously got distracted at the television last night. It's by the tv.
A New Day!

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This Morning
I woke before the 5am alarm and turned it off so the music would not disturb the wife. Was awake enough that I should have gotten out of bed. Instead I lounged and had some bizarre vivid dreams.

Now I cannot find Tommy's medicine. It's refill time so I cannot give it to him from the bottles. I had planned on cleaning manically in the kitchen before Cathy woke and instead I'm tearing the house apart trying to find something that I should be able to pickup with my eyes closed. This is so frustrating.

Thursday, May 13, 2004

John Kerry is mad about unemployment. John Kerry didn't vote in the Senate Tuesday. Jobless bill fails by one vote.
Did my candidate screw up?

"They are going into bankruptcy, defaulting on their mortgages, they aren't able to afford health insurance," said Cantwell. "Where are the priorities of my colleagues?"
Wow! Someone in government cares!

The snake passed. It definitely was 1.2 meters (4 feet) or more. Since the cat killed the chipmunks and I'm taking out the habitat and the snakes, a part of the appeal of the yard is lost for me. It's been a long time since I noticed Racoons or possum too. The owl is rarely heard anymore and I haven't seen the hawk alight in years.

I am still excited about the progress on the yard. I have great plans!
Yuck. Just ran the lawn mower over a 4 foot (1.2 meter) black snake and it lived. I like having those snakes around. They keep the mouse population down. I need to go put it out of its misery and bury it.
A New Day!

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This Morning
Woke feeling miserable this morning. Got the kids up at 6 and slept until 6:25 then gave Tommy his medicine. After getting the kids off I came home to sleep some more but mostly laid in bed listening to Amy play over the intercomm. An hour later or so she started to ask for Dada so I went upstairs and we sat on the couch together and watched television and she wrestled some. After Cathy woke I returned to a deep sleep for 2.5 hours. I can feel my body fighting something and winning.

Last Night/Afternoon
It was Cathy's birthday and of course I went upstairs with intention of reminding the kids but I forgot and they went the whole day without saying anything to their mother. Poverty and stress kept me from making her special day anything special at all.

In the evening Tommy stayed home to watch a movie while Cathy and Sarah did some mall shopping and Noah, Amy and I went to a muddy soccer field to have practice cancelled. We all ended up gathering at IHOP minus Tommy. This disturbed Noah greatly, "I wanted Tommy to come." So Noah and I had one of those conversations about decisions and consequences and making choices.

Later a naked Amy was sitting on Tommy during reading time and peed on him. He reacted but for Tommy it wasn't altogether that bad a reaction.

Sarah and I watched a movie on the Mayan pyramids as an extra credit assignment then I realized we missed Smallville! Ugh! Got to spend some time with Cathy after the kids went to bed.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004


I went and picked up two cakes from Rita's Bakery (thanks to a wonderful mother-in-law) and delivered one to Cathy's mother (who will deliver it to her mother) and one to Cathy.

Now I prepare for a meeting followed by an interview.

From the mouths of babes

Amy has the greatest way of saying "hello"... "Hi Dada Hi!" and I now reply "Hi Amy Hi!" It's so sweet!
A New Day!

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This Morning
Woke at 5 to silence the music and debated getting up. Woke again at 5:50 and turned the alarm off so it would not go off at 6. Noah woke me at 6:10. Gave Tommy medicine at 6:25.

Last Night
Spent quality time with the wife. As tense as she's been lately something seemed to have dropped. She was much more relaxed.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

My friend the fiend caffeine

Spread out caffeine jolts to stay alert

...a new study suggests that it may be better to stretch out the daily dose by drinking smaller amounts throughout the day.
... sleep-deprived people who took low-dose caffeine tablets did better on cognitive tests than those who took a placebo.
...those who took caffeine also reported feeling sleepier, which suggests the enhanced wakefulness of caffeine does not replace the restorative benefits of sleep...
Hmmm.. to drink or not to drink?

Don't let the kids put you down too soon

Worried you might wake up in your coffin? Fear not! Coffin Alarms are here!

The special caskets will have buttons that can be activated if the supposedly dead person wakes up.
...even if the coffin was buried four feet deep.
4 feet?!

Late afternoon/eve

Came home to watch the kids while Cathy ran errands. Sarah and Noah immediately shot out the door to their friends. Noah later returned with sandwich bags of Cicada exoskeletons..Cathy will be thrilled when cleaning his room tonight. Sarah returned right behind Noah and was less than thrilled when I asked her to write down phone numbers of the people she invited to her party complaining "I'll call them!" Well, if I waited until she called them she'd be 12 before I knew who was coming to her 11th birthday party.

She ended up helping me and I completely 11 phone calls to her 3. She will not be a call center operator that's for sure!

Dinner was cooked. Pizza for the younger 3 and 30 minutes later brocoli and cheese stuffed chicken breasts for Tommy and I. Cathy is at a Girl Scout Council meeting and will eat later. Tommy was angry that he wasn't eatting thin freezer pizza declaring "It's not fair!" in a huff. He was later very happy with his meal wanting more after shoving it down. Amy ate most of her slice of pizza and is helping me finish my chicken. Cathy left a half a 12 oz glass bottle (long neck) of orange creme soda here and Amy keeps drinking from it--never spilling a drop!

Eat then Dump

Had lunch with some old business associates. We reminisced briefly then mostly talked about our families. Took a trailer load of trash to the dump. Need to do about 2 more but I don't see it happening.

Working to work; wanting to work

Spent 9am-11am making phone calls and sending emails to try to drum up contracts.

Now must get ready for a convoluted lunch time.

Book Burning

High school bans book on censorship.

The book that started the flap, "Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress," is a novel about censorship.
Fifteen-year-old Brandon Jerome was caught off guard by the sexual references in a book for his ninth-grade English a passage about a virgin having sex.
...a student drew an explicit picture of a boy and girl having sex as part of a class drawing exercise on the book. The drawing was displayed with others in the classroom.
Obviously not understanding the full circumstances, my initial thoughts are that this censorship is an overreaction. As a curious 15 year old (and much earlier) I had been reading my friend's father's Hustler magazines, magazines found in my own house (where I learned my first French Oui!), medical journals, National Geographic, novels and anything else that would give me a clue about the female anatomy and how I might chance to become more intimate with it. I think that when the schools can integrate a sexual education into the material without stepping into perversion that they are doing nothing more than answering questions that the students are already seeking. When coupled with important encouragements such as "don't be afraid to talk to your parents about sex" the environment can be a catalyst for students making the right decisions. When we remove the mysticism from things like sex you lessen the need for exploration and discovery. I'm not discouraging sex and not implying that talking about it will make teenagers not do it. I am saying there is no harm in educating them about the main thing on their mind.
I am ordering a copy!


Sarah and Noah got themselves read with happiness and no problems. After dropping them off at school I returned to find Amy playing happily in the girls' room. I opened the door slightly and started to return to the kitchen to hear an excited voice say "ooeh Dada!"

How is it that if you put something in a pile for Goodwill that the children know it must be pulled out and played with. Amy instantly went to a ride-on toy lion although she has the most exceptional ride-on toy car. Amy is jolly this morning. Non-stop talking. Playing very nicely.

A New Day!

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This Morning
My body is adjusting to the concept of waking earlier. At 5am my wife kicked me because the music alarm was on and I had not silenced it. I never fell back into anything more than a light sleep. Mostly I stared at the clock until 6am. The next challenge is making myself get out of the bed.

Sarah wanted something out of her room so I went to get it and Amy squeaks in the sweetest little voice "Hi Dada." I had to reply "Hi Amy. Nite nite."

This morning I'm in a cool, calm freak out. Needs: call all my contacts, letters to business, call local developers.

Last Night
What more Futurama with the wife. Can't find any easter eggs on Disc 3 for Season 3 which is somewhat disappointing. After watching an episode of Futurama on DVD we turned on Futurama on television (just worked out that way) but we were both falling asleep so Cathy says turn it off. I began to get frustrated because the dvd remote was having absolutely no effect on turning the show off. After a few seconds Cathy says, "Oh! This is the tv!"

Monday, May 10, 2004

National Condom Week

According to Durex - This a UK campaign and has some very nice posters and lesson plans from the link.
Special thanks to terreus for the interesting pictures that led to the Durex site.

Progress and Not Progress

I got a pile of trash (mostly construction debris) off the driveway and into the trailer so I can take it to the dump. I need to make 3 such trips this week to prepare for guests. I have an impossible amount of work to do, the money is gone, and I need to spend every waking moment trying to get work.

I have a networking opportunity tomorrow with a group of old associations/friends that could help but at the same time I need to be at Tommy's psychologist appointment. Perhaps I could show up for 15 minutes then meet Cathy, Amy and Tommy at the appointment. That would accomplish both while not having to buy lunch at a restaraunt and not getting caught up in old gossip.

I made calls today regarding work -- that was good. I should have made calls until my ears bleed -- not good.

Work Safe

Job Mirages

Just checked in with the recruiters and each of them said they've got me in the hands of 2 potential hiring managers and "end of the week" is a possibility for interviews. I hope my phones still work at the "end of the week." There is also "another possibility" out there with one of the recruiters. And I've got my own searching that is supposed to have me an interview this week. That puts us at 5.5 possibilities with potential salaries ranging from $45k/yr to $80k/yr.

Lottery is Wednesday...

Blogger Makes News

Google unveils redesigned

The latest version of the free product allows users to instantly publish their Weblogs, or personal journals called "blogs," from any e-mail-enabled device, including cellular phones and handheld devices. Other new features also enable Blogger users to invite comment from readers or to post personal profiles.

Amy is having a rough time.
The end is near. Hitting rock bottom AGAIN!

My mind is distracted with something I want to do and cluttered with the array of things I need to be doing.

Best Deaths

AMA 2003 Worst Ways to Die Awards

Final Tally
1. "Lust" skewered in sex, Se7en (27.8% of votes)
2. Hung, stretched, castrated and decapitated, Braveheart (10.5%)
3. Alien eating its way out of your rib cage, Alien (9.9%)
4. Castrated by skinheads, The Doom Generation; The Machine, The Princess Bride (tied at 8%)
Dead Last: Choked in your dorm room while your roommate ignores you, Urban Legend (0%)

Of interest

From the mouths of babes

This morning Amy wiped her eye while eatting a powdered doughnut and ran to me crying "baby boo boo!" I used the magic words "Daddy kiss it" and kissed her gently then asked "All better?" She said "all better" and walked off happy.

What a feeling!

Changes to Blogger

They certainly added some interesting features as described in The Great Blogger Relaunch

My personal favorites are:
Built-in comments I still like Haloscan but I think I may experiment with Blogger's commenting. Blogger's system give you the ability to limit commenting to registered Blogger users, or allow anyone to commment, or only allow team members (for group blogging) to comment. The do not have trackback and to transition from Haloscan to Blogger's comments would mean losing all my past comments. I think I may experiment with the new features in a new blog and then decide how to more forward. This feature certainly changes my pet project of writing a commenting system.

Post Page Archiving This is cool. Every post now ends up as its own page if you turn this on. So instead of using a permalink (which makes the entire archive load and waits until after the load before jumping down the page) you can now have every post with its own url. I'm a little torn on this one because it reads as if it will read like a Xanga post where you are looking at the one post and its comments but don't have a clear way to return to the surrounding posts for the full story. Fortunately Blogger thought of this and has added Conditional Tags so that if you are on an archive page it gives you a quick way to return to the main blog.

And Posting by email In what looks like a system borrowed from Phlog Blogger now allows posts from email. If your email, such as a cellphone, tags an advertisement or other text to the end you can tell blogger when to stop by putting #end into your message. Blogger does not support picture attachments yet so I don't think we can combine Phlog and Blogger quite yet but I bet it comes soon.

Judgment still out:
Profile Tags These allow you to use a tag like <$BlogOwnerLastName$> to show your last name. The benefit of course being that if your last name ever changes you can make that change in your settings and the change will be reflected in all your psots. These don't really excite me.

There is still much to experiment with and learn to use. Good job Blogger!

Fellatio 101

Encouraging schoolchildren to experiment with oral sex will curb teen pregnancy

Encouraging schoolchildren to experiment with oral sex could prove the most effective way of curbing teenage pregnancy rates, a government study has found.
Pupils under 16 who were taught to consider other forms of 'intimacy' such as oral sex were significantly less likely to engage in full intercourse...
However, teenage 'drownings' are on the rise particularly in the girls... Man I'd love to be a teenager in today's world! :)

I was just about to go lie down again. Amy has announced herself. I guess it's playtime for me for the next hour and a half. Perhaps I can get some cleaning done in the kitchen while she plays. Excedirin Migraine has caffeine in it! And it might take some of the ache out of my legs and arms! No. I'll a hot tea.


I want a coffee..but we are out of coffee. So I pace.
A New Day!

Let's start the day off with a PayPal donation link:

This Morning
Woke at 5 and slept lightly until 5:50. Although ready to go I didn't want to go.

Last Night
Blogger was being updated so I didn't get the afternoon/evening blogged.

I washed the car that had been loaned to us.

We joined the church crowd for Mother's Day lunch at CiCi's Pizza Buffet. Cathy was given a rose by each of the other children. How wonderful! We used this gathering as an opportunity to return the loaner car. Now we are down to the Jeep and the station wagon until I can get the tags worked out on the Dodge Neon which needs to happen quickly. It needs tags, one taillight, insurance and a professional detailing. It could probably stand to have all fluids changed and a tune-up.

After CiCi's, Sarah and Noah went with their grandparents for choir practice and
we dropped Tommy off at the house where he napped and played video games. Amy, Cathy and I went shopping for birthday goody bag supplies. Amy was a horror. We left a wake of destruction in every store!

We returned home around dinner time and I rushed out to wash the station wagon (Mercury Sable). The cars needed cleaning badly. I did not get to the interiors of either the station wagon or the loaner.

After dinner and getting the kids down my sore body longed to lie in bed. We found easter eggs on the Futurama Season 3 dvds. Much fun!

Sunday, May 09, 2004

Cleaning the wrong thing

I am completely botching Mother's Day. I am not making Cathy feel special at all.

Now I am heading out to wash the car that was loaned to us and we've since abused the privilege of having it. I want to get it cleaned out and washed to return today but I feel like Cathy would prefer the work be done on our house. Everything I do has internal conflict for me. I want to be cleaning our cars but I need to be cleaning this car. I want to be baking a cake and doing things for Cathy but I need to be taking out trash and washing the floors. I want to be buying her things but I am not producing income.

The stress makes my heart feel weak.

Tony Clifton organizes party for Andy Kaufman

Party for Andy Kaufman to be held 20 years after his death. He said if he was faking it, that would be the day he would be back.

Andy Kaufman died of lung cancer on May 16, 1984, but according to legend, the eccentric comedian said if he were faking, he'd resurface 20 years later to the day.

From the mouths of babes

I'm flabbergasted!

The 23 month old just loudly and very deliberately with enunciation Aunt Mary would have appreciated said, "[L]Ucy - stop - it! -- dat's - baby's - ereal!" after spilling her cereal on the floor and seeing the dog go over to eat it.

Two sentences! One thought! Noun verb pronoun -- pronoun contraction(verb) noun possessive noun(object of possessive).